I grew up in a family which follows the Chinese traditions. And Chinese would always believe in buddhism, well for most of the people that I know. In our country though, since Catholism is predominant, many of the Chinese people that I know are Catholic-Buddhist, meaning, they would go to churches to pray to God on Sundays, but would also check out feng shui to confirm whether what they are doing is good according to the astrological stars. And since I studied in a non sectarian school, we didn’t have the chance to get to know God in my younger years.
When I entered college, I met quite a few people with different beliefs and religion. Some of them are catholics, and some christians. I learned some prayers being taught in the catholic university, which we were required to recite at the start and end of every subject. I even learned how to pray “Our Father” in Spanish! Once in a while, we were required also to attend sermons by their priests which where attendance is recorded – so for a perfect attendance, and some additional points, I attended them along with my other catholic blockmates. I enjoyed their sing alongs and the funny priests who delivers the message.
I have known God even before, but I never knew that my belief in Him was not enough. I pray every night before I go to sleep, thanking Him for all the blessings that he bestowed upon us, and keeps asking him to protect our family from any harm. I would help the people in need because I feel that that is my purpose in this life. And that was all. For all I know, I have been my best when it comes to my faith.
But in truth, such doings are not enough. Though I know that they are part of it. I realised that I have to get to know God more. That I have to read the bible to hear his words. And while reading them is not enough, I have to understand what each statement means and how it affects our life.
I used to be a worrywart. I worry over the smallest of things. I worry until how old would I be living. I worry if I will be safe once I set foot outside of our home. I worry that I may not do well at school and in work. I worry if I am not enough to the people around me. I worry if I am hurting someone unconsciously. I worry, worry and worry. There were so much that I worry about. So maybe that could be the reason that I have a hard time falling asleep at night. There was no peace in me.
So now that I have got to know God more and having let him into my life, I found myself happier and more content, with less worries to think about. Now I can be rest assured and have a really good night’s sleep. For I know that no matter what happens, God will always be there to guide and protect me all the days of my life. 🙂