Last night, I saw a high school friend at the mall. Whom I was a bit disappointed of. You know why? Because no one from their group attended my wedding day, and that was a year ago plus 3 days. So that would mean that 368 days have already passed since that unhappy incident happened. I know it has been so long. And as a normal person, when you see someone you know, without thinking, my normal response would be “Hi!” with a matching big smile. Then suddenly, everything flashed back into my mind, making me think that, am I really already okay?
I remember that I was a bit in a bad mood for like – 15 minutes when I learned that none of them are appearing on the day that I am tying the knot. Hmm. Quite unusual for me eh? Since I really am a sentimental person, I get hurt very easily. But thank God that I learned that not everything in this life will go with our will. Some of them will not fit into the spaces that we create, and more often than not, we should be the one adjusting. And since I didn’t want to ruin the rest of the afternoon on the day before I get wedded, I decided not to think about it, and move on.
Everything went smoothly as planned. Except for some little bit of problem. But thank God coordinators existed. They are really life savers. I didn’t even worry about anything that day. And instead, I focused on enjoying every single moment, and taking note of every single detail. While others were panicking, I stayed my calm as a bridechilla and just chatted with everyone else.
So anyway, back into ‘that group’, they meant a lot to me. But sadly, I am not sure if I am able to accept. But as much as possible, I am trying my best to forget the sad event and hopefully I can forgive them too. At least I didn’t have to see them everyday for it will be much much harder for me to let it go. At least now, I see them seldomly, that I might be able to miss the times that we had before, how we grew up with one another, and be able to grow wiser each day.
I hope that soon, I will be able to face them with a happy heart. Without hurt and healed scar in my heart, and be able to be reunited with them again. I hope that when the time comes, I will be free from bitterness so that love would flow freely on its own. I know that God can make it happen, in His time. So till then, I will just enjoy my life and be happy for them. 🙂