Soon it will be my 10th year anniversary in my current job. Woohoo! I did not expect that I would be staying in the same company for a decade. When I first started working there, I was thinking that maybe I would be staying with them for like 2 or 3 years. But look now, it took me 7 more years with them. Funny, because some of my friends here also had the same sentiments. Though since we weren’t really sure of what to pursue or where to transfer to, so we were stuck in the same office together. Many others have joined our team and already left and we are still here. Yet, sooner than later, I think that maybe I would have to leave the company, more so that now we are planning on expanding our family. And since it is hard to hire nannies (in our country), I think I would be left with no choice but to (finally!) bid goodbye to the company.
I am not saying that I am hesitant to leave, but you know how it feels being in your comfort zone: having quite a few close friends that you hang out with and you eat with every lunch, and having been used to the commute daily (though it gets tougher to wake up early each day). Leaving would mean having a change in my lifestyle and shifting from being with people to being at home all alone, with only the bed, pillows, and television to talk to. Being unable to get updates on the lives of the people that I used to talk to everyday is quite saddening. And I know that in the long run, it will be more difficult for us to meet regularly. But hopefully we can still do it on our day offs.
Even before, I dreamt of having to work as a freelancer where in I can have all the time that I need and still be able to earn money. I am glad that my husband is quite supportive of this crazy idea that I have. He believes in my ability without him seeing them yet. I really do hope that I can earn money by doing so, because that is what I really want to do in life. That despite having to take care of my family, I can still be able to become independent financially, because you know, well life right now is not that easy, and it really takes commitment and discipline to be able to earn for a living.
I know that there are a lot of ways on how to earn for a living, like starting your own business, or the likes. But it frightens me at the thought because I really am not confident enough to set out a big capital, start from scratch and make the business grow all by myself. It seems to me that it is scarier than having to live life on this Earth. So I hope that the dreams that I have right now would become reality soon. That I would be responsible enough to stay focused on the plans that I have. Because I know that God is always there to support me all the time. And thank God for giving me a very supportive husband, that even if I myself is unsure of my abilities, he is always there at my back to remind me that I can do what I have been wanting to do. 😉